I've Caught the Bug
I've caught a bug. It's nothing I can't recover from, but boy do I have it bad. No, it's not the flu or a cold. I've got baby fever. Bad.
I'm the mother of two. A daughter (adopted from Kazakstan) and a son (born to us) who mean more than anything to me. However, I can't help but want another child.
When R and I went to premarital counseling we both bubbled in three on the survey when it asked the number of children we'd like to have. I kind of feel like we agree on that before we got married. We would have three children.
Having two is definitely different that having one. It's a heck of a lot of work. I'm tired all the time. I don't feel like I do the kids justice. I feel like I'm only half a wife. I even feel like I don't do a good job with my job. Too much too do, too little time. Yet I constantly come back to having another baby.
Do I want to get pregnant again? Yes and no. I would love to be able to feel a baby move around inside me again. I'd love to give birth again. I'd love to breastfeed again. I don't want to spend months trying to get a full night's sleep. I don't want to stress over when to start solids. I don't want to spend another year of caring for a sick baby who has caught everything coming and going in daycare.
So I guess you're wondering where #3 is going to come from. Simple- adoption. My heart tells me that there is a child out there who needs me as much as I need him/her. A child who has no family and needs one as badly as I need another child.
R isn't big on the idea of a 3rd child. Money- we can't afford one. So I've spent alot of time praying about this. Tonight we ate Chinese and his fortune and mine were sure signs that this is meant to be.
LA's fortune - "You are going to have a new love affair."
R's fortune- "A rich partner is ordained for you."
My new love affair is with this child. Randy's ordained partner is me of course, and I will be so much the richer when I feel my family is complete.
We've got a ways to go, but I think we're heading in a direction!
I'm the mother of two. A daughter (adopted from Kazakstan) and a son (born to us) who mean more than anything to me. However, I can't help but want another child.
When R and I went to premarital counseling we both bubbled in three on the survey when it asked the number of children we'd like to have. I kind of feel like we agree on that before we got married. We would have three children.
Having two is definitely different that having one. It's a heck of a lot of work. I'm tired all the time. I don't feel like I do the kids justice. I feel like I'm only half a wife. I even feel like I don't do a good job with my job. Too much too do, too little time. Yet I constantly come back to having another baby.
Do I want to get pregnant again? Yes and no. I would love to be able to feel a baby move around inside me again. I'd love to give birth again. I'd love to breastfeed again. I don't want to spend months trying to get a full night's sleep. I don't want to stress over when to start solids. I don't want to spend another year of caring for a sick baby who has caught everything coming and going in daycare.
So I guess you're wondering where #3 is going to come from. Simple- adoption. My heart tells me that there is a child out there who needs me as much as I need him/her. A child who has no family and needs one as badly as I need another child.
R isn't big on the idea of a 3rd child. Money- we can't afford one. So I've spent alot of time praying about this. Tonight we ate Chinese and his fortune and mine were sure signs that this is meant to be.
LA's fortune - "You are going to have a new love affair."
R's fortune- "A rich partner is ordained for you."
My new love affair is with this child. Randy's ordained partner is me of course, and I will be so much the richer when I feel my family is complete.
We've got a ways to go, but I think we're heading in a direction!
posted by LA | 6:26 PM
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