Birthdays Are A-comin'

In just a week, my baby will be one year old. It doesn't seem like a year has gone by. He has changed so much and I'm sad that I will no longer have a baby in the house. On the other hand, I'm ready to be finished with the labor intensive part of his childhood. The spoon feeding, bottle making, and constant supervision part that comes with infants and babies. I have loved doing all those things, but I'm ready for him to be more independent.
G will turn five just two days after P turns one. She is such a little girl. Sassy, sweet, and smart. It seems like only yesterday I held her sweet seven month old body for the first time. I look at the pictures of her first birthday and marvel at how fast the time has gone. My sweet baby girl is now so grown up.
R's sister got married this weekend and some old friends asked if we were going to have a #3. I said not an infant, but I'd love to go to China. R commented again that he is too old to have another baby. Someone else commented that he wasn't. Glad to have a second opinion that matches mine!
So I haven't given up. Not by a long shot. Just have to work on my sweet husband. I have a plan.

I've Caught the Bug

I've caught a bug. It's nothing I can't recover from, but boy do I have it bad. No, it's not the flu or a cold. I've got baby fever. Bad.

I'm the mother of two. A daughter (adopted from Kazakstan) and a son (born to us) who mean more than anything to me. However, I can't help but want another child.

When R and I went to premarital counseling we both bubbled in three on the survey when it asked the number of children we'd like to have. I kind of feel like we agree on that before we got married. We would have three children.

Having two is definitely different that having one. It's a heck of a lot of work. I'm tired all the time. I don't feel like I do the kids justice. I feel like I'm only half a wife. I even feel like I don't do a good job with my job. Too much too do, too little time. Yet I constantly come back to having another baby.

Do I want to get pregnant again? Yes and no. I would love to be able to feel a baby move around inside me again. I'd love to give birth again. I'd love to breastfeed again. I don't want to spend months trying to get a full night's sleep. I don't want to stress over when to start solids. I don't want to spend another year of caring for a sick baby who has caught everything coming and going in daycare.

So I guess you're wondering where #3 is going to come from. Simple- adoption. My heart tells me that there is a child out there who needs me as much as I need him/her. A child who has no family and needs one as badly as I need another child.

R isn't big on the idea of a 3rd child. Money- we can't afford one. So I've spent alot of time praying about this. Tonight we ate Chinese and his fortune and mine were sure signs that this is meant to be.
LA's fortune - "You are going to have a new love affair."
R's fortune- "A rich partner is ordained for you."

My new love affair is with this child. Randy's ordained partner is me of course, and I will be so much the richer when I feel my family is complete.

We've got a ways to go, but I think we're heading in a direction!